Tuesday, September 20, 2011
"Blog 2" The Allegory of the Cave!
The Allegory of the Cave (The Republic, book Vll) is about human beings who lived in an underground den and have been chained by their heads and necks and have been living like this there whole life. In this darkness, the only thing they seen were their own shadows. One day a prisoner finally had the chance to step outside of this cave to the real world and discovers it's nothing like the cave he was trapped in. He becomes amazed of the world before him, as he stepped out of the cave his eyes couldn't handle the glare of the sunlight. As time went by, the human now can view the sun, the moon and the stars better in the light, then in pure darkness. He then realizes that the prisiners were still down in this den and felt sorry for them. The human insisted on going back to the cave and warned all the prisoners that the world before them is beautiful and explained to them the environment he had seen, and the cave they were in is nothing compared to it. The prisoners were upset and replied to the human that he was hillusinating and it was all illusions. They were not leaving and whomever tried to make them leave they would kill them.
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Hello Jamalis,
ReplyDeleteMy name is Juan and I will be giving you a what you did well and offer helpful feedback on what you need to work on:
The main idea must be simple and to the point to give the reader the information to remember during the text without putting to many aspects about text.
1. Is the main idea (thesis) of the passage clearly and correctly stated?
NO
2. Are the important supporting ideas stated correctly and fully?
YES
3. Are all (or nearly all) unimportant ideas excluded?
NO
4. Is the summary in the writer’s own words?
YES
5. Is the summary written with few grammar/spelling/style errors?
YES,
prisiners-prisoners
whomever-whoever
hillusinating-hallucinating
A few grammar mistakes that you could fix during the class. Try to read the news paper is EXCELLENT exercise.
6. Does the summary retain the sense and organization of the original passage?
NO
7. Is personal opinion included in the summary?
NO ... That is the way that it should
Do not stop writing and use creative methods to increase your writing. You have a wonderful ideas about the text but its only hard work as life thing are so much easier when people fight for it. Another idea I could provide to you is do not be afraid to show the read emotions NO PERSONAL but about the structure that you are developing. REMEMBER write write write until your mind is free.
ReplyDeleteTake care